Beyond 'Hey': 30 Conversation Starters That Actually Work

Why "Hey" Doesn't Work

Messages containing just "Hey" have a response rate of about 25%. Messages that reference something specific in the person's profile? Over 60%.

The Formula: Observation + Question

• Notice something specific in their profile
• Make a genuine comment about it
• Ask a question that's easy and fun to answer

Great Openers

• "That hiking photo is incredible — where was that taken?"
• "Your dog is adorable! What's their name?"
• "I see you're into cooking — what's the last thing you made?"
• "Your answer to that prompt made me laugh. I have to know the full story."
• "Important question: what's your go-to karaoke song?"
• "If you could only eat one cuisine forever, what would it be?"
• "What's the most underrated thing about your city?"
• "On a scale of 1 to 10, how competitive are you at board games?"

The Golden Rules

• Be genuine — People can smell fake interest
• Keep it short — 2-3 sentences max
• End with a question — Make it easy to respond
• Don't comment on appearance only
• Don't use copy-paste openers